Last week I was frustrated.

I’d spent 4 months NOT writing anything but blog posts.

My muse kept flipping me the finger and downing margaritas (and who knows what other recreational drugs).

My list of queried agents on QueryTracker had dwindled to one unanswered partial (4 months old) and about 6 unanswered queries.

I’d tried to write. Several chapters had actually been completed. A few of fluff, one, maybe even two of non-fluff.

Still, I wasn’t excited.

Doubts hung low over my head.

I still LOVED my story. My characters.  (Just as I still love my first novel)

But me and Writing?

We were on the skids.

Not even speaking terms, apparently.

Then one morning last week, during the long days of the icepocalypse here in the mid-west, I was online (as per my usual).  On twitter one of my friends had tweeted: “Can you do me a favor? While I’m sleeping, tweet me one thing you love with a passion, so I can learn more about my friends tomorrow. #love”

I hit ‘reply’ and started to answer with writing.  Then I stopped.  Why would I put that?  I was in such a bad place with it. Writing didn’t love me back, why should I love it?  Then I realized I didn’t have a choice. I was in love with writing.  I had been for years – even when not actively participating in it.  Words were my passion.  So I hit reply.

I said:

@SarcasticMomLC One thing that I #lovewith a deep passion? Writing. Creating characters, worlds, stories. It makes me happy.

And I meant it. I felt it down to my toes.

When she replied with a high five, I added just a little bit to it.  I mentioned that I had almost NOT written it because: “Srsly, I hesitated putting it down b/c it’s not easy, but it is #love. Who said that was easy?”

It was time to give Writing love, whether it repaid me or not.  Writing was going to get some Tough Love. I would love it. I would continue to push out chapters.  Words, my worlds, my characters, they are all a part of me. They help me vent stress, anger, love, and hope.

Apparently, love was all it needed.  From that moment, when I embraced that it might remain unreciprocated, it decided to return the love.

An hour after my original tweet good things started to happen.  In the past week I’ve been writing again with LOVE, ENTHUSIASM, JOY.  Chapters have poured out (others have trickled).  My reading has picked up (although I still struggle with the same frustrations I mentioned last week).  Other happy events have occurred, but I won’t speak of them in fear of jinxing them.

Apparently Writing was giving ME some tough love – and I just didn’t see it.

Thank you, Writing for the tough love.

Thank you, Lotus, from the bottom of my heart.  You might not have planned it that way, but your tweet sparked a much needed revolution in my heart & soul.

*~*~*~*

Over at Redefining Perfect, I am feeling beautiful on the Flip Side.