[flickr id=”6202967832″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”]I talk freely about almost everything here. The kids, their ‘challenges’, my challenges, the days that I feel like giving up and the days of great joy.
There is one thing I never talk about – except in passing. The one subject I never dive into for numerous reasons.
My husband of almost ten years suffers from severe, often debilitating depression.
Most of the time we manage. I am the silver-lining girl. I push us forward, I find the light at the end of the tunnel for him.
But sometimes it overwhelms and consumes.
And one of those times is now.
Erik & I, despite living with this for 10 years, are now making the hardest push we have ever to tackle this.
Together.
So little by little you will see us both start to open up about this here.
When he is ready. When we are ready.
Until then, I only ask that you send good thoughts, positive energy, or prayers (whatever is your preference) in his direction. While we search for answers for the best possible course of action toward a positive future. A future he deserves after his incredibly long struggle.
I think that when we share so much with this online world and count on the support we get (even if it’s only a couple of people), it makes it super hard when we’re going through things and can’t write about it. There are things going on in my life right now that are breaking me, but I can’t write about them on my blog because it’s personal and most of all because our families read my blog. In any case, I am sorry that you guys have to struggle with depression. It’s really hard. I’ll keep both of you in my prayers, and I want to say that I think it’s brave and important for you guys to open up about it when you choose to. Even though so many people struggle with depression there still seems to be a stigma of shame around it. When I first called the doctor to get medication for my depression/anxiety I felt really bad and it was really emotional to ask for help. I think every time that someone like you shares about it, it helps other people feel like they are less alone.
Thanks, Rachael.
I have always tried to post honestly and openly about most of our lives. There are a few subjects I keep mum on out of respect to family that might read. For the most part I try to cover everything.
Most of the time I don’t talk about this out of respect to my husband, but he is starting to see how an outlet and these connections help me. As we make this journey hopefully we will be able to talk more openly about it. I think it will help us all.
Saw this on the #withtheband tag on Twitter. I am so sorry to hear that your husband has been struggling with this. It can be very hard for people to open up about depression, especially for men who are supposed to be emotionally strong all the time. I know my husband gets tired of dealing with my depression sometimes. In my case medication & therapy help, then I get better for a while, then I relapse again. But things can get better. I wish you all the best. If he feels up to it, I’m sure we’d support him if he wrote things from his point of view for BB2G. Hang in there.
Thank you for stopping by, Fallah. Your words and support mean a lot. I have encouraged him to write about this in the past, but he fears it is ‘too dark and disturbing’. Perhaps sometime soon, once we have received the help we need.
awe girl, praying for your whole family. Praying he finds peace with his demons, and that the darkness lifts quickly.
Thank you, lady. I am so glad I have found such wonderful people to have in my life after so many years of feeling like I had no friends or life outside of my computer. Knowing all of you are just an email or tweet away (as I lost most phone numbers w/ my phone ~ahem~ 😉 ) is such a life saver for me.
🙁 you know where to find me sweets.
Much love to hubby and you and the munchkins
I do. ~hugs~ You helped by making me smile (and blush 😉 ) during the past few days.
Your hubs is lucky to have a partner who understands, and is working hard to support him and help him. Much love and strength to you both.
Thank you, Tara. I admit to not always being supportive or understanding – I have failed him sometimes. With how bad things got this time we are both working to make sure neither of us end up in this place again. All the support we’re getting, both virtual and in person, has been a huge help.