by Sarah | Oct 12, 2012 | All About Erik, All About Marriage, All About Me
He was the first to ask US on a date. He included my beautiful three year old on our first date. He thought of us before he thought of me. He took us to an appropriate kid-friendly place. He talked to Denver, he madeDenver laugh. And when dinner was over, Denver looked at Erik and said, “Are you coming home to see Mimi and Papa?” The deal was sealed…he was special.
I held back, afraid to give up my heart. I couldn’t tell him I loved him…I was terrified of my past repeating itself. But once I was able to make that step, everything fell into place. Engaged and a wedding date planned before we’d hit the six month point. A fall wedding, as I’d dreamed.
There wasn’t a doubt…WE would be married. Not just Erik, and I…but Denver, too. He asked Denver permission to marry me, and he had Denver give me the ring – sending my mother into a fit of tears. The ceremony would involve Denver, and we’d be announced as a family.
And so we were. Our small family embarking on new territory. Making a path none of us was too sure how to follow. But we trudged ahead and forged it together.
The first year was tough as I pursued roles in Community Theater as well as marriage and mommy-hood. But from there, community theater was put on hold to focus on family.
We’ve had our struggles…financially, and emotionally. But we’re now at ten years and stronger than ever.
He’s the one that’s supported me, no matter what my dream or desire. He believes in me when I’m not so sure I believe in myself. He tells me daily that I’m beautiful, or a good wife, or both. He is proud of me as his wife, and as a mother.
So Erik, thank you for nine years of wedded bliss (and miss)…our struggles made us stronger…and your love makes me better.
by Sarah | Sep 7, 2012 | All About Erik
May the year ahead bring you peace and new happiness.
May the struggles of the past year move into the past and linger only to drive you forward into new and better things.
May the joys of this new year far outweigh the sorrows.
You’ve been my staunchest supporter, even in my craziest dreams. I hope that I can only be the same for you.
For the best husband, and most marvelous father, I hope your birthday far outshines every other before. We all love you.
Happy Birthday, Erik!!
*You old fart. 😉
by Sarah | Aug 9, 2012 | All About Denver, All About Erik, All About Family, All About Kennedy, All About Learning, All About Me, Cross Country, Friday Fragments, Random, The Teenager
[flickr id=”7665949676″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”]I’ve been having a good week…month…year. Whatevs, it’s all good. Okay, so there’s been ups and downs, but as I said recently I feel like I’ve hit my prime.
But for whatever reason my mind can’t wrap around a cohesive lengthy post today so you get the ever-marvelous bullet list of awesome.
- School starts in less than a week. Three kids. Gone all day. Makes me salivate at the thought of all that might get accomplished.
- Erik is doing a lot better. We’ve had a change in diagnosis & treatment plan, and things are looking up. Hopefully soon we’ll dive more into it – when he’s ready.
- In case you missed it – I’m being published. I so cannot wait until February to cross that sucker off my 45X45 list.
- The teen is entering high school. Honestly, not sure if this goes on a list of awesome b/c it sort of freaks me out – but it is happening. He’s in JV Cross Country practices now.
- We’re going to the State Fair on Monday. I’m actually pretty excited for this. Been a long time since I’ve done this.
- Erik & I have started walking together every night. It gives us added exercise & some time for just the two of us.
- I still have this 5k coming up but with the heat I have lapsed on training. Starting again real soon because time is running out (pardon the unintentional pun)
- Did I mention school starts soon? No? Well, it DOES.
- Oh, make sure you come by here tomorrow…I’m having a fun, flirty, sexy giveaway you do NOT want to miss.
by Sarah | Jul 20, 2012 | 45 before 45, All About Erik, All About Indiana, All About Me, Blogging Life, Bucket List, Indy Geek Girls, The Reluctant Hoosier
[flickr id=”7604254726″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”]Ever since the Super Bowl back in January all anyone in Indiana can talk about is the zip line. I never stepped one foot in Super Bowl Village – but I wished I had just for the zip line.
About two months ago I found out about Go Ape! Right in my own backyard here on the West Side, inside Eagle Creek Park, is a place where you can zip line, do Tarzan Swings, and just climb through the trees like a monkey. You can really Go Ape!
So I rounded up some friends, my husband, a few of their husbands, and we swallowed our fears, strapped on a harness, and climbed.
Did I say fear? Yeah, fear.
After the “bunny hill” courses that are only a few feet off the ground – you climb and climb. High up off the ground you make your way through 5 courses of increasing difficulty – and as a bonus every course ends with the zip line.
I admittedly screamed at every one.
Out of pure joy.
[flickr id=”7604174320″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”right”] The last three courses have options for your routes. You can do “moderate” or “difficult” on course 3 – and on courses 4 & 5 you have your option of “Difficult” or “Extreme”.
I chose the difficult routes because I wanted to challenge myself. After all, I am wiping this sucker off my 45X45 list (“Do something daring”) – because it scared me. Holy cow am I glad I did. Knowing that I challenged myself, conquered my fear, and took the leap (literally on the Tarzan Swing) makes me feel strong and empowered.
[flickr id=”7604240872″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”] The whole course left us feeling strong and empowered. Even my husband – who is terrified of heights, bridges, and couldn’t do the last Tarzan Swing (seriously, frightening stuff there) made his way through the course and felt so proud of himself for it – not that he’d do it again. ;).
It was a great ‘day date’ activity for us. It is an amazing team building activity too. Spending our time encouraging each other and cheering each other on (or is that daring each other?) to get through these courses cementing our bond of friendship.
[flickrset id=”72157630653559754″ thumbnail=”square” photos=”” overlay=”false” size=”small”]
We all left swearing to do it again.
After all, it’s in our own backyard and a combination of fun, adrenaline pumping, and an intense workout. Best of all? It’s $55 a person – and it takes you at least three hours to get through the full course. For teens it’s only $35, but you are responsible for them and limited to how many you can chaperone (Age limit of 10, height limit of 55″).
*~*
*Disclaimer: Me & 10 of my friends were given free tickets for the day by Go Ape. All the fun I had and my opinions are all my own.
by Sarah | Jul 2, 2012 | All About Erik, All About Molly, Autism, Special Needs
[flickr id=”7089103379″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”]Erik is in his 40’s now. Many years have passed since he’s had to live through school, classmates, the pressures of schoolwork.
But he still remembers.
The stress.
The desire to get away from chaos.
His ‘coping’ mechanism that gave kids a way to pick on him.
The “other”-ness he felt.
From day 1, Molly’s uncanny resemblance to her Dad has echoed in every picture, every look, every nuance and quirk.
It’s been both a source of great joy for him – and a source of great fear.
You never want your children to feel the pain you did.
And when you have one like Molly – one that struggles to express herself.
You don’t always know.
But sometimes you do.
You see it in her eyes.
You feel it in your heart.
Every day this past year I worried over Molly’s separation from her classmates.
It leaves me to wonder – how much does she know it? How much does she feel it? Will she remember when she’s in her 40’s? Or have we been able to spare her some of the pain? How long will these issues echo in her life, even with appropriate therapy?
The saving grace in her life is her sister.
Kennedy is the social butterfly to Molly’s cocooned existence. Kennedy relates to her when others can’t. For now, at least, Kennedy is her safe place.
If only we could keep her from beating the crap out of her safe place.
by Sarah | Jun 26, 2012 | All About Erik, Depression, Special Needs
[flickr id=”6293299563″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”]The other week I talked about the thing we never talk about. My husband, Erik, who suffers from severe depression was in one of his darkest times when that happened.
He nudged the edge of the cliff, and action had to be taken.
Today he is feeling better – tired, but a few feet back from the cliff. I can’t go into details but we took steps to get him much needed help, and he is doing it. It isn’t easy and some days he wants nothing to do with it, but he is doing it.
I’m proud to say that he has taken steps he’s never taken before, and so have I.
Progress is slow, and it isn’t always clear. We inch along, but we are still moving forward.
As we adjust and learn more, and he grows more comfortable with it, hopefully we can share more of this process we are going through. Because as he improves I become more aware of things I need to step up and change as well.
Right now I can tell you that the biggest step we’ve made is going through this together. It’s making a world of difference.
