by Sarah | May 10, 2012 | All About Me, Get Fit - Or Kill Myself - Whatever Comes First
[flickr id=”5094799890″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”]A couple of years ago I decided to try the C25k program.
Me? So not a runner.
Still, I did fairly well. I made it three weeks in – but since I had started in September the cold weather hit and gave me a marvelous excuse to quit.
Back during that time I didn’t have a smart phone, or an iPod or anything to download that handy app and listen to what I want. I found a couple of sites that created a download with the “run now” and “Walk now” instructions built into a set playlist.
I don’t remember any of the songs on the playlist save for one.
[amazon_link id=”B001AUEMFS” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Viva la Vida by Coldplay[/amazon_link].
I don’t know why this one sticks out, maybe because it met my pace perfectly, or because it was one song that I really liked.
Either way – any time I hear it now I remember running through the streets of my town. It is all I can think of – and I actually get the urge to go running.
I’ve recently started exercising again. Hubby bought an elliptical, I’ve been using Jillian DVD’s (I love to hate her)…and once in a while I go for a C25k run.
I want to get back into it, and I plan on it. Part of me wants to be a runner (the major part is a scared, screaming little girl that HATES running, HATES track and field, HATES sports…let me DANCE).
Once school is out. Where I can run at 7:30AM once hubs is off to work in the school parking lot across the street.
Unless I can run around the empty high school parking lot where it is flat, I am faced with running downhill first, uphill second. That about killed me first time I tried to do this LOL.
I have a feeling that when I start running again, I’ll be seeking out Coldplay on my Pandora and starting my daily run w/ it.
by Sarah | May 8, 2012 | All About Me, All of Us, Crap, Random, Special Needs, Writing, writing tips, WTF?
[flickr id=”6271416484″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”]When I was young I used to love the Limbo. I was really good at it and always won.
As an adult, as a parent of special needs kids, as a human being – limbo has taken on a new meaning.
It’s the in-between.
The period of nothing.
No answers.
More questions.
Infinite waiting.
In my personal life. In my pursuit of a writing career.
Limbo now consumes my life.
Tests for the kids, my husband, myself. Infinite questions on our health, our futures.
Submissions of my work to strangers for judging. The ones that might hold the key to my writing future.
I hate limbo.
If I didn’t love writing so much I’d throw in the towel and end it just to give up another source of the interminable status of ‘waiting’.
I’m not about to do that. Writing is a part of me. It gives me release and happiness.
So I suppose somehow I have to turn this new definition of Limbo into something I can live with.
I just can’t see how to make it a party game.
Maybe a drinking game…
by Sarah | May 5, 2012 | Random
[flickr id=”5033124805″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”]This mothering thing.
Some days I excel at it. I feel proud of myself, of my kids and their accomplishments, of the things I’ve done around the house to make it a home.
Those days are few and far between.
Most days I suck at this.
I’m not a clean freak, and with five people in a tiny house I really should be.
Sometimes my girls go a full week between baths.
Some days I make the girls play for several hours in their bedroom so that I have some semblance of quiet.
Most days me and ‘patience’ are total strangers.
But damn do I love them, and although some days that’s all I can give them…
Every time, it’s enough.
by Sarah | May 1, 2012 | All About Erik, All About Kennedy, Random
[flickr id=”7082668411″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”]This morning the littlest angel could not be pleased.
Food – rebuffed.
Clothes – put on only after being directly ordered.
Hair – brushed through crocodile tears streaming down the angelic cheeks.
Finally we pushed, what was wrong with our Kennedy? Did she not feel good? Could she be tired?
“No.” Kennedy sniffed. “I don’t want Daddy to leave.”
Leave? What of this leaving? Where is Daddy going?”
“I don’t want Daddy to go to work.” ~insert dramatic sobbing and flopping onto my lap.
The girl – she has found her love of Daddy. After a few years where she sometimes acted as if Daddy was crap and Mommy was all that…we have had a turn. Everything is for Daddy, ‘like’ Daddy…and can she sit with Daddy to watch TV. Or snuggle. Or…
Either way, she will have to learn – Daddy has to go to work, and she has to go to school.
Meanwhile I just sit to the side and smile. I knew this day would come, now I get to watch Daddy enjoy the affections for a while.
by Sarah | Apr 30, 2012 | All About Denver, All About Erik, All About Kennedy, All About Me, All About Molly, All of Us, Crap, Random, The Teenager
[flickr id=”5888961016″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”]We have had birthday parties, track meets, doctor appointments and chaos the past few days. While I try to get my head on straight (and work on the blog redesign ~cough~) I’m going to have a little fun with some random subjects of note.
* Thank you for all of your well-wishes for Erik. The doctor appointment went really well. While he does have to go back next year for another endoscopy, the doctor isn’t overly concerned with the findings. As far as Erik’s continuing symptoms we are on a “Try a little of this…then try a little of that” program. We’re hoping to find something that works and eases his symptoms.
* Yesterday I finished the (final) self-edits on my novel ~insert cheering and mad boogie dancing on my part~. That means I will begin work on the site redesign pretty hard-core in the next couple of weeks. I plan on a new round of submissions and I want this site to shine by then. The first changes I make will be mostly cosmetic changes. After that I’ll be working on more functional changes, but they’ll happen once the feel of the site has been updated.
* Teaching a teenager accountability and empathy is HARD ~insert whining here~.
* My Kennedy has proven finally that she comes from the husbands blood line She may look just like me…but lately she has been obsessed with cleaning. That is SO not me.
* We had the girls family birthday party yesterday. They got so many cute clothes…I’m so jealous! My SIL and MIL got them a ton of new little outfits – and then both my Mom and SIL on my side got them clothes too. We have full closets and the girls cannot WAIT for the warm weather to come back so they can start wearing the skirts upon skirts that they got.
* Hubby bought an elliptical. I hate the elliptical…but having it sit in my little house, I actually use it because I feel crappy if it just takes up all that room for nothing. Between that and my continuing love/hate relationship w/ Jillian Michaels & her exercise DVD’s I may just start feeling good about myself again. Maybe.
* I swear, I will be talking about the Bloggy Boot Camp experience soon, after all it is a 45X45 item…but between my straight focus on my novel the past week & the fact that I’m still trying to process everything that went on that day, it’s been relegated to a “Very soon” post. Hopefully before the end of the week.
* I have a new job application sitting in my kitchen. It’s a job I’m certain I’ll be able to get (I’m super friendly w/ the managers at this place). It’s just a matter of “Can I” and “Should I”. This time I have to very carefully weigh all of the factors and not forget one like I did last year when I tried to work. I have some new factors to consider this time around, ones that may seal the deal.
*Speaking of jobs, I also have a chance at another possible opportunity. It’s something that I have to write up a proposal for and see where it goes. It would be helping out someone local and that really excites me. I just need to sit down and write…especially since that’s part of what I’ll be doing for her…writing. LOL.
* Did I mention that raising teenagers is HARD?? ~headdesk~
by Sarah | Apr 26, 2012 | All About Erik, Crap
[flickr id=”6293299563″ thumbnail=”small” overlay=”true” size=”small” group=”” align=”left”]For a few months Erik has been sick. After about two months of issues, he finally made the call and went into the doctor.
After a handful of tests he was sent to the specialist (A GI doc). He then had to go through more tests of the minor outpatient surgery variety.
Then came the waiting period. You know, the part that SUCKS.
His follow up appointment is Friday.
Two days ago we got a letter from the doc. It had the biopsy results. With several mentions of “pre-cancerous” conditions.
All of which my husband Google’d.
As a (slight) hypochondriac myself I try to not Google medical issues that pertain to me (I will Google for others). I know that if I Google for myself I stress more. It builds in my head.
And that’s what’s happening to the hubby now. One of the conditions in the letter could end up serious, and it’s sort of freaking us both out. The poor guy has been doing his best to keep calm and all of that – but depression and stress don’t mix well (although he has been doing a stellar job overall).
Tomorrow we meet with the doctor. In the hope that he will ease the worst of our fears and have a good, clear plan for where to go next.
The worst part – is it doesn’t seem like either of the ‘conditions’ in the results has anything to do with the symptoms that sent him to the doctor in the first place. The symptoms that are still plaguing him.
All we wanted is answers. In its place we got fears, more questions, and no resolution to the original problem.
