by Sarah | Jan 16, 2009 | All About Kennedy, Crap
The door is locked, the answers behind. The locks tease me by being on my side, but I have no keys for the padlocks, no crowbar to pull away the boards.
Peace is on the other side.
Answers.
I’m begining to think I will never find the keys. I will never see the other side of the door. Nobody has answers – everyone declares her unique. The one and only ‘answer’ we have is not cut and dried – it is confusing and unsure.
One more chance for a key has presented itself – but I hesitate. Should I take the gamble only to end up feeling hopeless and hollow again? On the small chance that this doctor may have that key? I don’t know that I have the energy, or faith in the doctors any longer. They have no more answers than I – and I have something they don’t…I’m her Mom.
by Sarah | Jan 15, 2009 | All About Denver, Crap
I would homeschool Brandon. Because nights like tonight I think he really NEEDS it.
I don’t know where the boy gets it from. But tonight he cried for an hour because we told him he would NOT be going to school tomorrow. There is only a two hour delay (I’m sure because of the temperatures) – but we’ll be keeping him home the full day. We’re doing this mainly because, although he’s 11 (almost), we aren’t comfortable with him staying by himself for two hours and getting on the bus.Â
Somewhere along the line in the years he’s been in school he’s become obsessed with his attendance. I know it’s not our fault – but I wonder if it’s the schools. I’ve seen notes from them on occassion on how some funding can depend on the amount of unexcused absences – and how we all need to work toward perfect attendance.
Tonight he got so upset that I came to the conclusion that I need to keep him out of school more often. He is far too obsessed over it. He will not go without some learning tomorrow…I found some science stuff I had buried that we can do together…but he wont’ go to school. I’ll do it again next month if I have to.Â
I would love to homeschool for his middle school years…I don’t want him to have to face the horrendously cruel nature of the middle school children – he’s far too sensitive, they’ll rip him apart…but I don’t think I have the discipline…and I’d really have no clue where to begin…
Even Archie said (and you can ask him, cuz he reads this blog :P) – “You’re smart enough…I just don’t think you have the discipline.” I’m not in the least bit offended, because I agree *lol* But it doesn’t make me stop WANTING to (really…I do). I have wanted to since 2nd grade-ish – and he’s in 5th now *sigh*. I think my recent foray into doing exercises daily has given me more ideas that it could be possible…but then I think I’m wrong…
Advice…thoughts? Should I start keeping him out more? I won’t ignore his education on those days…but the kid is sooo sensitive and he’s like insanely focused on his perfect attendance. I need to shake it up or something.
by Sarah | Jan 14, 2009 | All About Kennedy, Hypotonia
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Today I have a valid reason for my complaining and picking at my Angel’s faults…so does that make it complaining and picking? I’ll pretend it doesn’t (don’t tell me otherwise if it isn’t…I’m feeling so good about this *G*).
Tomorrow (Thursday) is Angel’s appointment with her new Orthopaedist at the children’s hospital where her pulm is located. I’m excited, and anxious…worried that I’ll be let down again. So, in preparation I’m making a list (of compaints) to present to the doctor. You get the privilege of reading that list ;) Lucky you, right?
So here’s my best compilation, hopefully I won’t forget anything…
- PT notes state her spatial awareness is still off – making her a possible danger to herself.
- PT notes also state she still prefers her right side for balance and strength.
- PT notes lastly state that she demonstrates bilateral hip weakness.
- At home we’ve noticed a visible difference in the length/size of her legs. It used to be minor and you really had to look and get her lying perfectly straight – now we can see it from across the room – and her feet are officially different sizes.
- Could this be causing scoliosis? It’s genetic in the family, I’m worried that this can make it come on sooner and stronger for her. My mother has a hump in her back hers is so severe (mine is more minor – thank goodness for dance).
- Changing her diaper has always been a nightmare, she hates having her legs/hips bent.
- Now pushing her knees to her chest causes complaint/full blown fit. It appears like her hips make her uncomfortable.
- She is showing improvements, but is it compensating improvements or actual improvements?
I’m sure I’m forgetting something…I’ll update as I go…if I remember, or Archie reminds me of something.  Wish us luck tomorrow…we’re going to need it! I was so disappointed in the last ortho, I’m afraid I’m a bit negatively biased ahead of time.
by Sarah | Jan 13, 2009 | Random
I used to be a dancer. I danced constantly. Had lessons about 4 hours a week, split between two evenings. Taught on Saturday mornings with two hours of classes after (advanced class and solo). I was always moving always going always doing.
I haven’t been going and doing for a while. Two years ago I was waitressing and counted that as semi-regular exercising…at least it kept my weight down enough that I didn’t realize I was pregnant for five months (another story for another time).
Since Angel’s been born and my subsequent hysterectomy taking care of myself has been a side note that’s remained silent. Exercise? NAh. Don’t do it.
So the stamina and body I once had are both long gone…
Last week I started doing yoga. About three out of five days last week I started my day with yoga. I enjoyed it, it was relaxing, and I could feel my muscles responding to it.
Saturday I went and signed up for a free week trial at the local gym thinking some cardio would do me good. I really just wanted at the ellipticals, etc.
Last night I went. I hopped on the elliptical and started at level one. Within one minute…my thighs were screaming at me to stop. I kept at it though for another fifteen minutes. Then I moved onto the bike which my body accepted with a little more contentment (except for the hard-ass seat that has left my bum w/ bruises…seriously). I spent another 25-30 minutes on that over two exercise runs.Â
I left the gym with wobbly legs and the thought in my head, “That’s why they call it a ‘work’ out. Because it’s a crap-load of work.” I admire all of you that work out in the gym every day…I’m still not sure I’m going to be able to handle it. I’m going to try…hopefully I’ll get to the point where I can spend more than ten minutes on the elliptical and still be able to walk!
Oh…and I’m going to abscond with ARchie’s ipod so I have something to listen to. The whole watching close-captioned TV wasn’t enough…I need some tunes 🙂
Anyway…more yoga today has been completed…and tonight I go back to the gym. I hope it’s not as busy.
by Sarah | Jan 11, 2009 | Weekly Winners
For the week of 1/05-1/11/09
Weekly Winners is the brainchild of the wonderfully Sarcastic Mom, Lotus
This week was all about three things, food, potty, and a candle I kept burning for Jess while she was in surgery. And as a little extra bit a brief trip to an antique shop – and did a little embroidery from a drawing of mine.
Focaccia
Soup with Love
Focaccia Panini
Bacon-Mac w/ Cheesy Garlic Bread
In Training
Playing Peekaboo
Tiny Town
Stacked
In Stitches
Relief in Wax:
And that’s it for this week. IT’s a lot, I know…but I couldn’t narrow it down!!
by Sarah | Jan 10, 2009 | All About Kennedy, All About Molly, Crap
Because I missed yesterday’s post because of my FANTABULOUS* webhost – you get a twofer today!Â
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First an update on Hell (or potty training).
Yesterday I leared that the secret of potty training is in the underwear. When I went grocery shopping on Thursday night I swung by Wally’s baby dept to pick up some diapers and big girl underwear. At home I knew we had Dora and generics…but I was prepared to get the same – until I saw them. “My Little Pony” underwear. The girls have recently gotten into their ponies so I snatched up a set of them.
Yesterday morning I started. I showed them to Angel and got her on the potty. After a while she went and we got up. She started walking around pinching her knees together within about 10 minutes and went back on. It was on and off for a few hours….but she had no accidents at all yesterday. She went on the potty several times. She hasn’t learned to cue me, we’re still going on on my determination, but she’s on the right track.
To add to the mix, Riley decided she REALLY wanted in on those pony panties…and started sitting on the potty, too! We talked Daddy into going to Wally’s and picking up some for her…and he found TINKERBELL! Riley’s new PJ’s are Tinkerbell, so she’s all over that.Â
So Daddy came home with Tinkerbell panties and a new potty chair so we could do both girls at once. Riley had two accidents yesterday, but overall did well- and Angel had no accidents. We’re going to stick with it over the weekend and pray for the best!
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All Related Posts
A brief update here on what’s going on with this.Â
1. For Body Image I managed to work out 3X (so far) this week. I’m heading down to the gym in a couple of hours. I learned that I can do yoga, pilates and the ball alternating here at home, but I crap out on cardio. Going to the gym gives me a way to do that AWAY from here (i.e. an excuse to get away) – without being annoyed by too peppy hosts. Give me an elliptical!
2. For Finances: First week of living on a budget was tough. We aren’t used to saying “No, can’t buy it I have $5 left.” The end result was happy, though. It looks like at the end of the month we’ll have a little cash in savings.
3. For Home & Family: We had sit down dinners I think 3 times this week (I didn’t keep track). I made dinner (taking pics of some of it) and cleaned as I went – the kitchen stayed mostly clean 3 out of 5 days. We had family game night just last night. For the cleaning portion, I found and adjusted for myself a chore list. I haven’t fully put it into effect, but I had Archie laminate it so I can reuse it. It will become a habit eventually, but it’s something I’m working toward.
That’s it for the week. Overall I’m very happy with the baby steps I’ve taken. Hopefully they will continue on.Â
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*And by FANTABULOUS I mean awful, horrible, no good, very bad…I’m very unhappy with them at the moment…and unless I’m granted a free year I’ll be taking the terrifying leap of trying a new host.Â
